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I just finished reading a book called "Stolen Innocence" by Elissa Wall about her life in the FLDS Church (a fundamentalist, polygamous offshoot of the Church of Latter-day Saints). Wall tells her story about her life up to the current time (she's about 21 now) and details of her life before, during and after her forced "marriage" to her cousin (when she was 14 and he was 19) and his rape and abuse of her. It is a very compelling story.

The society Elissa Wall grew up in had little respect for girls and women. Women were put in a subservient roll. They were treated like property whether they were girls or women -- either property of their fathers or property of their husbands. It's like that in the Muslim world, too.

When Wall described her school years, she told of how she was taught in the FLDS school. The children were taught strict church doctrine and trained not to think too deeply or question their teachers. I remembered, while I was reading this, Irshad Manji's "The trouble with Islam: a Muslim's call for reform in her faith," and her description of her education in a Muslim madrassa in Canada and how she was punished for asking questions. I remembered, also, my own opposite experience in yeshiva day schools. We were always encouraged to ask questions. I remember my three favorite teachers in High School, Mr. Steif, Rabbi Eliezri, and Rabbi Solnica, and my elementary school principal Rabbi Lazar, and how proud they would get whenever I would ask a hard question and whenever I wouldn't let them "get away with" a pat answer.

I also remember learning Midrash. Midrash is a collection of stories and explanations of things that are not quite so obviously understandable in the Torah. For example, in B'reisheet (Genesis), the Tora says that God created "Adam" as male and female. Since the story continues with "Adam" as a male seeking a female, the Midrash comes along with two explanations. One is the story of Lilith (Lilith, the Midrash says, was Adam's first wife who wouldn't submit to him and left when he tried to control her). The other says that Adam was created as one being with male on one side and female on the other and in order to create "Eve", God simply separated the front from the back to create two separate beings. This, the Midrash continues, is why people seek their bashert, their "other half," to complete themselves.

Because of these seemingly contradictory Midrashim, we were always taught to question things. We were also taught to not take everything in the Torah literally. We were encouraged to analyze the language of the Torah and to think for ourselves. We were taught to come up with answers to our own questions.

I've noticed that many of these fundamentalist religious groups reprimand people for "questioning" their beliefs. The leaders need to maintain control over their "flocks" and their only way to do this is to inculcate their people with doctrinaire ideas. If the people believe, as the FLDS do, that their only route to heaven and salvation is in doing exactly what their "prophet" tells them or, as fundamentalist Muslims do, that Jews are evil and Allah wants them to murder non-Muslims, they remain under the thumb of their leaders and depend on them for all their knowledge and life needs.

I have always felt fortunate for being born into a modern Orthodox environment. My parents, grandparents, and teachers supported my questions and helped me find my spiritual way in the world, even if it wasn't exactly their way. My teachers and role models always knew they were intellectually coming from a strong place, from the truth. When you have the truth on your side, you know that you don't have to worry about people questioning you.

There's a button I've always liked -- it says "Question Authority". I agree wholeheartedly. But I would say "Question everything..." until you are satisfied with the answers. Liars always have to make up answers and their answers don't always match. Honest people aren't afraid to say, "I don't know, I'll have to check that out for you." Honest people don't have to "keep their story straight". As they used to say on the X-Files, "The truth is out there". Don't stop questioning until you find it.

Debbie Israel is a graphic artist (see https://www.cafepress.com/compugraph2 for some of her work) and tutor living in Highland Park.