Opinion & Commentary:

If it's Tuesday, we must be ... in Israel somewhere

By Judith W. Rosenthal

July 18, 2008

During a recent trip to Israel, I couldn't help but remember the popular 1969 film, "If It's Tuesday, This Must Be Belgium". The movie was a satire about "packaged" European tours, which in that case involved visiting seven countries in 18 days. Now, fast forward almost 40 years and join 80 of us from the U.S. and Canada who spent two weeks in Israel on a 60th Anniversary Mission organized by B'nai B'rith International.

I have done a lot of traveling in my lifetime, visiting temples in Kathmandu, the ruins of Machu Picchu, the souks of Marrakech, the Kremlin in the former Soviet Union, and the Taj Mahal in Agra. I have swum in the Amazon River, flown over Mount Everest and the Himalayas, lived for a while in Mexico, and toured much of Europe. However, in spite of being a seasoned traveler, I must admit that I was floored when I first received the itinerary for our mission to Israel.

How could we possibly cover the entire country, from north to south and east to west in just 13 days? Was this a 60th Anniversary Mission or "Mission Impossible"? Weeks before we departed, I began preparing for the trip by poring over a map of Israel and studying Fodor's "Israel" (sixth edition). Instead, I should have gone into training, getting my legs in shape by climbing stairs and walking on cobblestones, strengthening my left arm by carrying a bottle of water, and improving my coordination by doing all this while holding a camera and shooting pictures with my right hand. I should have spent 16 hours a day in the blazing sun and practiced getting by on six hours of sleep a night.

Mid-May, my sister and I flew overnight to Tel Aviv where we immediately joined our tour (boarding bus one of two) and headed north for a full day of site-seeing. We were a mixed lot, traveling with B'nai B'rith. One gentleman, age 90, had already made 50 trips to Israel. In the 1950s, as a veterinarian, he had accompanied more than 500 head of cattle to Israel by ship. There were other repeat visitors, Holocaust survivors, as well many of us making our first visit to Israel. My sister and I, figuratively speaking, traveled with little "baggage". Our grandparents left Eastern Europe in the 1880s; we are secular Jews, didn't lose any loved ones in the Holocaust, and have no relatives living in Israel. Inevitably, this would influence how we "experienced" Israel. Jokingly, I nicknamed our tour buses "The Wandering Jew" and "Meals on Wheels" since traveling and eating were our two major activities. Each bus was accompanied by a professional and knowledgeable Israeli guide.

No one wants to hear about everything we saw and did, which, of course, included visits to such major sites as Masada, Yad Vashem, and the Western Wall. However, let me just mention the three places I found especially interesting. These were places about which I knew little or nothing prior to visiting Israel. In Jerusalem, The Herzl Museum pays tribute to Theodor Herzl who, in 1897, convened the First Zionist Conference. We visited the Independence Hall Museum in Tel Aviv (in what was originally the home of that city's first mayor, Meir Dizengoff), where David Ben-Gurion and Israel's leaders gathered on May 14, 1948, to announce the establishment of the State of Israel. And finally, north of the city of Rehovot and camouflaged by Kibbutzim Hill, we visited the underground Ayalon Institute where more than two million bullets, later used in the War of Independence, were secretly manufactured.

Up at 7 a.m. and on the bus by 8, we immersed ourselves in the sites and sounds of Israel. We saw the Red, Dead, and "Med" Seas, crossed the Sea of Galilee by boat, visited Roman ruins, synagogues both ancient and new, and countless museums. We ate kosher food, including Chinese and Moroccan. At 9:30 p.m., when we wanted to turn in for the night, B'nai B'rith brought in speakers (among them a columnist from the Jerusalem Post, a kibbutznik, and a member of the Knesset) to brief us about Israel. Be that as it may, let me leave any discussion of the complicated politics and history of Israel to others and send a silent "thank you" to the person who suggested I reread James A. Michener's "The Source" (1965) in preparation for this trip.

After two intensive weeks of travel and site-seeing, it was time to fly home, but before that could happen, I was stopped by El Al security; the "suspicious" object in my suitcase turned out to be . . . my Fodor's guide to Israel! On this trip there were a few things I wanted to do and places I wanted to see but didn't or couldn't. For example, I couldn't plant a tree, since this is a shmita year, nor did I get to visit Rachel's Tomb. But that is trivial compared to what we did see and do. Who knows if I will ever return to Israel, but one thing is certain. My respect for that country, so small, so young, and so sandy, has grown immeasurably. What Israel has achieved in 60 years makes me believe that alchemy is possible.

 So, in closing, and on a lighter note, let me tell you how it was to travel non-stop for two weeks with a group of 80. More or less set to the tune of the chorus of "I've Been Everywhere" (which is currently used in a Comfort Inn commercial), here's my summation:

I've been to

Caesarea, Haifa, Akko, Rosh Hanikra,

Kiryat Shimona, Pequi'in, and Tiberias,

The Galilee, Golan Heights, and Tzfat,

Capernaum, Ein Gev, Jerusalem, and Eilat,

Stopping at the Masada where it sure is hot,

Visiting countless museums but not on Shabbat.

I've been everywhere, man

I've been everywhere.

I've been to

The Negev, Kibbutz Sde Boker, Jaffa, and Tel Aviv,

Looked out on the Mediterranean Sea,

Seen Bedouin camps and camels galore,

Did so much shopping I now am poor,

Took a side trip to Petra in the state of Jordan,

Never once suffered from a case of boredom.

I've been everywhere, man

I've been everywhere.

I've been to

Yad Vashem and the Western Wall,

The Palmach Museum and Independence Hall,

The Ayalon Institute caught my attention,

Salmon farming in the desert just has to be mentioned!

Synagogues, churches, and mosques abound,

In almost every village a McDonald's is found.

I've been everywhere, man

I've been everywhere.

I've been to

The market, eaten chick peas and schwarma,

Seen the IDF, the ultra-Orthodox, and even a farmer,

I walked along the Cardo in Old Jerusalem,

Saw a man riding a camel talking on his cell phone.

You can't visit all of Israel in just two weeks

But you certainly can have more than a peek!

I've been everywhere, man

I've been everywhere.

I've been to

The north, the south, west, and east,

I've walked through grottos and cobble stone streets

My feet are aching, I'm tired of the bus,

With 80 people there's always a fuss.

We are all exhausted, it's time to go home,

Of course it's on El Al that we have flown.

I've been everywhere, man

I've been everywhere.

Judith W. Rosenthal is a professor of biological sciences at Kean University. She lives in Edison.